In the sunset of his presidency, George W. Bush who has the singular distinction of being the most unpopular President in US history, and possibly the most reviled and despised American around the world, decided to do the honorable thing and do something he previously took pride in not doing -- reflect, ponder, contemplate.

When I read the headlines, "Bush Recalls Moments of Regret," Bush Speaks of Regret," I broke open the chips and hummus to read his Apologia. This will be good, I thought. The President who once said, "I'm not a guy who looks in the mirror," should have something profound to say... like someone looking past the long shadow of a life to talk about that first love, the one that got away.

A well crafted apology can work wonders. Who can disown a swaggering teenager who takes the family car for a midnight spin, and then cries with great beauty, pearls of remorse streaming down cheeks, when caught? A cheating spouse can redeem him/herself with a good mea culpa and aerobic make-up sex. In Japan, politicians who screw up render public apologies about their misdeeds, and the bravest of them show they really mean it by ending their own lives. This I think is a bit unfair -- to leave the innocent electorate with survivors guilt.

So, lay it on me Mr. President, I thought as I opened the first link. You got us into a war that costs us $435 million dollars a day, $3 billion a week, $12 billion a month. It would be a good thing to apologize for -- at a time when many of us are wondering if we should sell our remaining assets (prized rubber band and CD collections) to make rent. It would reassure those who're worried that Stephen Colbert is right -- that Chinese people may soon be allowed by law to keep Americans as household pets, since they own us by the short and curlies.

Perhaps he'd apologize to our servicemen and women who went to Iraq to fight the good fight -- to avenge 9/11, to find the WMD, to secure the weapons of chemical warfare first touted by Colin Powell during ceremonial waving of perfume bottle at the U.N. Or maybe he'd say sorry to the military families who made the greatest sacrifices, while his acolytes, Ari Fleischer and Bill Kristol,and all the other war-mongering media sat at their computers, sipping cappucino, while pontificating on the price we must all pay for freedom and democracy.

Or, just maybe the President would apologize to the Iraqi people for bombing their country and turning it into rubble, for no reason other than to "kick some ass," as he told former terrorism czar, Richard Clarke days after 9/11.

But, no. The President has regrets speaking in front of a "Mission Accomplished," banner, and he regrets saying "dead or alive," and "bring 'em on." Nothing, it seems, will dim the eternal sunshine in the spotless mind of our 43rd President.

Gail Vida Hamburg is the author of The Edge of the World, a novel about the impact of American foreign policy on individual lives referencing Graham Greene's The Quiet American. (Mirare Press, 2007) Her second novel, Liberty Landing -- inspired by John Dos Passos' USA Trilogy -- is planned for release by Mirare Press in 2009